I don’t mean to fall for Fox. I never mean to fall for any of them if I’m being transparent. These things just happen and I am just a woman after all, kill me for having a heart, for feeling tender and soft, for wanting a deeper exchange. Fox , you so slick the way you slip and slide outta my sphere. And though I haven’t seen you in months and although you’re a frequent CASPER , I can’t help but want you. Despite all the ways you showing me you don’t want me. Desperately I ask you to tell me how I can be a better girl, how I can be a hotter woman, how I get you to show up every now and then. You don’t hear me or you choose to lead me on you fucker and I am sick of you for existing and wasting my time with ya texts of ” Hey, Hey” and ” how u doing”. Do you know how I cry from ya withdrawls, from those dates planned with ya chronic absences and demanding work and ya finals and ya tests and all ya reads with no responses. You play with a girl Fox, you be knowing what you do and don’t care. You have to know and I ain’t crazy cause I don’t hit you till you hit me and in the meantime Fox I ain’t twiddling my thumbs waiting on your thick dick and your soft lips and the way you whisper in my ear. I ain’t waiting on the way your muscles hit my fat and squeeze my tits and palm my ass and grip my clit, my normally soft candy that brickens when you touch me. Nah baby mama still playing the game. And striking out usually Fox, they ain’t got ya dick and they ain’t got ya lips and they don’t send me ” HEYHEY” and ” How you doing”. And their sweet voice that ain’t accented don’t hit me the way you do Mr. Man.
I had a realization lately Fox that it ain’t me. That in fact it’s all you with my infatuation , and my need for degradation and my attention compulsive disorder and we have a problem on our hands. Neither one of us wanna look fucked up while being all the way wrong. The passion isn’t one sided but the pursuit is. And you’re locked up and I ‘m locked out and there’s tons of words that won’t ever get said. I love that you been breathing way longer than me Fox, makes me think more of you with your PHD pursuits a custom degree to go along with ya PHD , a sapiosexual nympho’s wetdream. I could cream if I COULD JUST ON THOUGHTS OF YOU. You’re hot asf and you just don’t know Fox how bad I be wanting you to just want me back. Gimme all of you , how you sweat so clean, how does it taste like water. Why are you everything and ignoring me ?
I’m a weak bitch when it comes to ya type Fox. I mistake your quiet , mysterious nature for seemingly deep when in many cases it’s hella superficial. I get smitten by your willingness to perform like a boyfriend ,touched by your obvious acting when you pretend you like kissing or hugging or cuddling. I take your good fucks as enjoyment of me as a person as a woman and not a hole. I never stop to take note that I’m asking all the questions and making all the moves and offering more and more. I don’t dispute my passion and take it as credence of the possibility for more. I violate the sanctimony of casual when I dip into being a human, the robot in me should activate when the dick hits those spots, when the moans are out my control, yelling so loud fuck the neighbors, fuck any allusion that i’m any sorta proper lady .
We at our end Fox. It been this way coming for a while now. I may soon develop enough respect to truly block ya ass for good, delete your name, make you a memory like my others. A name , eventually I’ll forget the nuances of the good sex, I’ll forget how you kiss me like you love me, how I start to love you a bit for making me feel so good. I’ll forget all those initial pangs of hope for more. I’ll forget your power to punish my panties with passion alighted and disregarded. I’ll get to a point where I’ll say fuck you Fox and by then there will be someone new.